Book III (continued)

"As I was coming to you, abba, " he said, "I found this solidus in the way. Could you do me a favour and publicise it in town so that if the person who has lost it can be found you can give it back to him." The old man went out and made announcements about it for three days, but could find nobody who had lost the solidus. Only then did John say to Abba Jacob; "If no one has lost it I will give it to that brother I am in debt to. For I was coming to you, either to borrow or ask you to give me enough to pay my debt, when I found this solidus."
And the old man marvelled that John, even though he was in debt when he had found this solidus, did not pick it up immediately in order to repay his debt, but turned back from it twice, and the third time made his find public.
Another wonderful thing about him was that if anyone wanted to borrow anything from him he would not pick it up to give them with his own hands, but would just say, "Go in and take what you need." And when they brought it back again, he would just say, "Go and put it back in the place where you found it." But if they did not bring anything back he just said nothing.
149.   Abba Poemen said, "Don't feel you always have to get your own way, but rather humble yourself to do what your neighbour wants."
(This paragraph also in V.iv.30, attributed to Pastor) When this same Abba Poemen was bidden to the common meal he wept, but would still go lest he offended his brothers by disobedience.
He sacrificed his own will and humbled himself to follow the will of another.
150. (Also in V.xiii.8 & VII.xviii.1) An anchorite living in a cell near the coenobium practised many virtuous acts. When some monks from the coenobium visited him, he was obliged to eat outside his usual fixed time.
"Were you not upset, abba, because today you have not kept to your usual rule," the monks asked him.
"The only time I am upset is when I follow my own self-willed inclinations," he replied.
151. (Also in V.xvii.12) Abba Paphnutius did not drink wine. As he was on a journey one day he came across a group of robbers who were drinking wine as they went along. The leader recognised him, knew that he did not drink wine, but seeing that he was tired from the effort of his journey, he filled a large cup with wine and offered it to him, standing there with a sword in his right hand.
"If you don't drink this wine, I will kill you," he said.
The old man knew that the robber chief really wanted to keep the commandments of God, so in order to win him over he took the wine and drank it.
"Forgive me, father," said the robber, "I'm afraid I have abused you."
"I trust in God," he replied, "that by means of this one cup of wine he will have mercy on you both now and in the world to come. "
"And I trust in God," said the robber, "that from now on I will not molest anybody."
So the old man won over the whole band of robbers.
152  (Also in V.xvii.14) There were two brothers, the elder of whom said to the younger. "I would like us to live together."
"You could not live with me," said the younger, "I'm such a sinner."
"We could do it," he said.
Now the older man was very pure and rejected any idea that a monk could entertain any depraved thoughts.
"Let me think about this for a week," said the younger, "and then we can talk again."
At the end of the week the elder came back to him and the younger, wanting to test him, said,
"I have succumbed to a great temptation during this week, abba. I had occasion to go into the village, and while there I sinned."
"Do you want to do penance for it?" he asked.
"I do," he said.
"I will carry with you a share in the punishment for your sin," the elder said.
"If that is the case, we would be able to remain together," he said. And they remained together until the time that one of them died.
153  (Also in V.i.21 & VII.xvi.2) An old man said,
"Any act which a man holds in abhorrence he is not likely to do to anyone else. Would you hate it if someone robbed you? Don't rob anyone else. Would you hate it if someone slandered you, or despised you? Don't you do likewise in any of these things to anyone else. Keeping this rule suffices to keep you in the way of salvation.
154  (Also in V.iv.33) After abba Poemen and abba Nuph came into the desert, their mother longed to see them and often came to their cell, but they would not allow her to see them. She took advantage of the time when they would be going to church and went to meet them, but when they saw her coming they went back and shut the door of their cell, leaving her outside calling to them with many tears.
"Whatever shall we do about this mother of ours," abba Nuph said to abba Poemen, "crying away outside the door?"
Abba Poemen went to the door without opening it, listening to how loudly she was crying.
"For an old woman you are making a lot of noise. Why are you crying so much?"
She recognised the voice of her son and cried out all the more.
"Because I long to see you, my son." she said. Why won't you see me? Did I not give you birth? Did I not feed you at my breasts? I am tired of the way you keep on putting me off, and now that I have heard your voice my whole being is churned up with longing."
"Would you rather see us now, or in the world to come?" said Poemen.
"What makes you think that if I don't see you now, I will be sure to in the world to come?"
"If only you could contain your desire to see us now, without doubt you will see us there for ever. "
She went away quite happy, saying, "As long as I shall assuredly see you there I do not need to see you now."
155  (Also in V.xvi.4 & VII.xix.2) John the Less of Thebaeus, the disciple of abba Ammon, looked after the old man in his illness for twelve years, and although the old man could see that it was hard work for him he never gave him a kind word of praise. But on his deathbed, with the other old men sitting round, he took John 's hand and said three times, "You will be saved, you will be saved, you will be saved."
And he commended him to the old men, saying,
"This is not a human being, he is an Angel, for he has looked after me for such a long time in my illness without ever hearing a word of praise from me."
156.  Once when Abba Agathon went into the town to sell his goods he found a pilgrim lying sick in an alleyway with no one to care for him. The old man stayed with him, renting a room where he could work with his hands and minister to the sick man. He stayed four months till the sick man was well again before returning to his own cell.
157. (Also in V.vii.16, attributed to Syncletica, and in VII.xx.1) A certain great old man said to his sick disciple, "Don't be depressed, my son, because of bodily sores or illness, for it is especially devout to be able to give thanks to God even in illness. If you are made of iron the fire will burn off your rust. If you are made of gold you will progress from great things to greater. Therefore don't be anxious, brother. What may become of you if you bear it ill? Endure it therefore and ask God to give you whatever it is that he wills."
158. (Also in V.vii.41 & VII.xx.2) There was an old man who was frequently ill and weak in body, but for the whole of one year he had no illness at all.
He took this badly and wept freely.
"You have abandoned me, Lord," he said, "you have not visited me for this present year."
159. Also in V.xi.52) When some brothers were standing around the bed of an old man dying in Scete, bidding him farewell and weeping, he opened his eyes and laughed. A second time he opened his eyes and laughed, and a third time he did the same thing.
"Tell us, abba," they said, "why are you laughing when we are weeping?"
"The first time, I laughed because you are all frightened of death. The second time because you are not prepared for it. The third time because I am passing from labour to rest."
160. (Also in V.i.16, attributed to Pambo) Abba Pammon on his deathbed said to the other holy men standing round,
"From the time that I first came to this desert place, my brothers, and built my little cell," he said, "I do not recollect that I have ever eaten bread that I did not earn with my own hands, nor had to repent of any word that came out of my mouth, and yet now that I go to God it is as if I have not begun to serve him at all."
161.  (Also in V.xi.2) When abba Agathon was dying he lay for three days with his eyes open and without moving. The brothers touched him and said, "Where are you now, abba?"
"I am in sight of the judgment of God," he replied.
""Are you not afraid?" they asked.
"In this life I have always studied how to keep the commandments of God as far as it lay in my power. But it is only as a human being that I think what I have done is pleasing to God.
"You don't trust that what you have done has been according to God's will?"
"In the presence of God I have no such trust," he said. "Human judgment is one thing, the judgment of God is another."
162. (Also in VI.iii.6) When the time of his departing came upon abba Sisois, many of the old men gathered round him and saw his face shining with a sort of radiance.
"Abba Antony is coming to us," he said.
And a little later, "Look, the company of the prophets."
And his face shone with an even brighter light as he said, "The blessed apostles are here."
He seemed to be talking to someone and the brothers asked him whom he was talking to.
"The Angels have come to take my soul," he said, "and I have been begging them to wait a little to give me more time for do penance."
"You have no need to do penance any more, abba," said the fathers.
"I tell you truly," he said, "I think I have not yet even begun to do penance."
They understood from this saying that he had arrived at perfection. Then, his face shining with the splendour of the sun, he cried, "See, see, the Lord is coming!"
And with this word he gave up his spirit and the whole place was filled with a sweet scent.
163. (Also in V.x.9, V.iii.1 & V.xv.9) When the time came for the blessed Arsenius to depart from this world, he said to his disciples, "Let no offerings be made for me except one single service. It would look as if I had caused them to be performed."
His disciples were worried that his time was approaching.
""My hour has not yet come," he said to them. "When it does, I will tell you. But you will stand with me in the divine judgment before the tribunal of Christ, if you give to anyone else any part of my miserable body as if it were a relic."
"How shall we go on then, father," they asked, "for we do not know how a body should be buried."
"Wouldn't you know how to tie a rope about my feet and drag me up into the mountain?"
His eyelashes had all fallen out because of his constant weeping. All his life through, when sitting at his work he kept a basin in his lap to catch his tears.
When he was dying, he began to weep.
"Why are you weeping, father?" they asked him. "Surely you are not afraid?"
"Indeed I am afraid," he replied, "and this fear has been with me ever since I became a monk."
When abba Poemen saw that he was on the point of going, he said,
"Blessed are you, abba Arsenius, for having wept so much in this life. Anyone who does not weep in this life will weep for ever in the next. Human beings must needs weep, either in this life of their own free will, or in the next because of the torments."
164. (Also in V.xvii.11 & V.iii.14) The blessed bishop Athanasius once asked abba Pammon to come down to Alexandria. And when he saw some secular people as he was going down with his brothers, he said, "Come and greet the monks and get their blessing. For they are ever speaking with God, and their voice is holy."
And when he saw a woman of the theatre he wept, and the bystanders asked him why.
"Two things make me weep. First, that this woman is a lost soul. Second, that I have never put as much effort into pleasing god as this woman has into pleasing sinful men."
165. (Also in V.xi.44) It was said that for one old man his thoughts were always saying to him, "Don't bother today, repent tomorrow," to which he always replied, "Not so, today we must repent, and let the will of God be done in us tomorrow."
166. (A shorter version of VI.i.16 & VII.xxiii.1) One of the fathers related how a certain bishop had heard that two men of his flock were disgraceful adulterers, and he asked God to show him if this were true. So after the consecration of the offering, when they both came up for Communion, he looked carefully at the faces of each one. The faces of sinners always appeared to him as black as charcoal, with bloodshot eyes, others always appeared with clear faces dressed in white garments. And after receiving the body of the Lord, the features of some seemed to be lit up, the others in flames.
In order to find out which of them had committed the crime he gave them Communion, and saw that the face of one of them was fair and honest, the other's black and ugly. And as the grace of the divine mysteries began to take effect he saw a beam of light illumine the face of one, while flames burnt all over the other. The bishop prayed that he might know the meaning of what he had been shown about each one. And an Angel of the Lord came and stood beside him.
"Everything that you have heard about them is true," he said. "But one of them persists in his disgrace and is determined to go on sinning. That is why you saw his face was black and all in flames. The other has also done exactly as you have heard, but you saw his face illumined with a clear light because it is recorded that he has renounced those evil deeds which he formerly committed. With tears and groans he has begged pardon from God, promising that if his sins might be forgiven he would not commit them again. So his former sins have been wiped out and he has come into that state of grace which you have seen."
"I marvel," said the bishop, "that the grace of God has not only rescued this man from the torments due to such a disgraceful life but that it has rewarded him with such honour."
"You do well to marvel," said the Angel, "for you are only human, but your God and ours is naturally good, and kind to those who cease from their sins. Those who come to him in confession he not only forgives but crowns with honour. For God so loved mankind that he gave his only begotten son for sinners, and for sinners he gave him up to death (John 3.16). While we were yet sinners he chose to die for us (Romans 5.8), so how much more must he love us when we have become his own! Know therefore, that there in no human sin which can extinguish the love of God, if only each one can wipe out his past evils by penitence. For the Lord is merciful, and knows how strong the passions are, and how strong and malicious is the devil. He cares for his children when they fall into sin, and offers them amendment of life, he has compassion on those who are slow to repent, but when he has loosed them from their sins he bestows upon them the rewards of the righteous."
Hearing this the bishop marvelled and glorified God.
167. (Also in V.xviii.20 & VI.xxiii.2) Abba Paul the Simple had this gift that as he looked at the faces of those going in to the church he could tell whether their thoughts were good or bad. As they came to church the old man saw them going in with bright faces and cheerful minds and their Angels joyfully going in with them. But he saw that one person was very black, the shape of his body shrouded in mist, with demons dragging him this way and that by a rope through his nose, and his holy Angel standing sadly a long way off. As he sat in front of the church the blessed Paul began to weep bitterly and beat his breast at such a sight. All the other old men who saw him weeping begged him to tell them if he had seen anything amiss in them, and to come with them into the church. He would not go in, however, but continued to weep for the man he had seen.
A little later, when the congregation had been dismissed he again looked at people's faces to see whether they were the same as they had been when they went in. And the man whom he had formerly seen as black and shrouded in mist he now saw with a bright face and gleaming body, the demons a long way off from him and his Angel right beside him, happy and greatly rejoicing. Paul then rose up and joyfully blessed the Lord.
"How great is the mercy and kindness of God!" he said. "How great is his compassion!"
And going up to higher ground he shouted out, "Come and see the works of the Lord (Psalms 46.9), come and see how he wills all men to be saved and come to a knowledge of the truth (1Timothy 2.4), come let us adore him saying, "You alone can forgive our sins."
When all had gathered near him Paul described to them what the man was like that he had seen before church and what he was like afterwards. And he asked the brother whom he had seen to declare what his thoughts and deeds had been, and how God had granted him such a great change of heart.
"I am a sinful man," he began to say, "and have often committed fornication. But as I came into the church today I heard the words of the prophet Isaiah, or rather the voice of God speaking through him, 'Wash yourselves, make yourselves clean, cast out from your hearts the evil in the sight of my eyes. Learn to do good, seek judgment. And though your sins be as scarlet yet shall they be washed white as snow. And if you will be willing and obedient you shall partake of the good things of the land' (Isaiah 1.16-19). And I, a miserable fornicator, was conscience-stricken by this word of the Prophet, and I looked into my heart and said to God, 'Lord, you are he who came to save sinners. So what you have today promised through the Prophet, fulfil in me an unworthy sinner. Look, I make a promise to you, and confess from the bottom of my heart, that I will no longer do evil, but renounce all my wickednesses, and serve you from now on with a clear conscience. Now, O Lord, from this moment accept my penitence, as I adore you and renounce all my sins. I have sworn in my heart that I will keep all your commandments' (Psalms 119.145). With this vow I came out of church determined never to go back to my former sins."
Then all the old men shouted with a loud voice, "How great are your works, O Lord! You have done all things in wisdom" (Psalms104.24).
168. (Also in VI.ii.10 & VII.xiv.1) When abba Joseph and some other old men came to a meeting with abba Poemen, the parent of abba Poemen brought along a child with a deformed face and sat with him outside the monastery, weeping. One of the old men heard the sound of weeping and went outside to ask why.
"I am abba Poemen's parent," said the man, "and I have come here so that he could see this child, afflicted by such a sore trial. I have hesitated about bringing him here up till now, because I thought he might not want to see me, and if he knew that I were here now, he might well try to drive me away. But seeing that all you fathers are here, I decided to come. Please, abba, have pity on me and take this child inside with you, so that Poemen may pray for him."
The old man took him inside and devised a clever plan. He did not take the child straight to Poemen, but went first to the younger brothers, asking them to sign the child with the cross and pray for him, and after that to the seniors with the same request. Last of all he took the child to abba Poemen, who at first did not want to have anything to do with it. But when he was asked to do as everyone else had done and pray for the child, he gave in, and groaned and prayed.
"O God, make your servant whole, and free him from the domination of the devil." He signed the child with the cross, and he was immediately returned to his father, cured.
169.  Someone asked one of the fathers, "Is it a good thing to live in need?" And he replied, "Penury is a great thing. For although he who embraces it willingly may well suffer in the flesh, he will nevertheless find peace in his soul."
170.  (Also in VII.v.2) A brother asked an old man whether he should seek for repayment if a brother owed him some money. The old man said, "You could gently remind him, but only once."
"What should I do if I ask him once and he gives me nothing?" he asked
"Don't ask him again," the old man said.
"But what shall I do if I can't stop thinking about it unless I bother him again?"
"Just let your thoughts rattle on, only don't upset your brother. Remember you are a monk."
171. (Also in VII.xiii.10) A brother asked an old man how the soul could acquire humility, and he replied, "By thinking only of your own sins and not other people's."
(Also in V.xv.77 & VII.xiii.5) He also said, "Humility is the mark of a perfected person. The more a person humbles himself, the greater his honour. Pride exalted to the heavens is cast down to hell, but to descend into the depths is to be exalted to he heavens."
172.  (Also in VI.iii.16) When Macarius was walking in the desert he came upon a man's head lying on the ground. He touched it with his staff and a voice seemed to come from it.

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